Just going to shave my head bald and wear a fucking sack cloth maybe by then everyone will be pleased
you know how the sentence “i never said she stole my money” has a different meaning depending on which word you put the stress on? same is true of “have you ever had sex with a pharaoh?” i’ve been thinkin about that for like 10 minutes now
I put the pussy in a sarcophagus
"no homo" I whisper as I look at my garden of pea plants. The progeny had expressed a 1:2:1 ratio of phenotypes. I am Gregor Mendel.
HURRAY FOR BEING TOTALLY FUCKING ALONE ON BREAK
quote me out of context a lot after i diejesus, probably (via jesuschristofficial)
Hope everyone is having fun on their beach vacations while I’m left at home alone to rot :)